Smiles & Tears

The summer was very hot and very long ..but we couldn’t go for holidays because I was busy redecorating our house …also to build an extra bathroom …so we decided that we would go in the winter holidays..(ejazat nisf a’sana ) ….anyways all plans went into drain when my mom got very sick …and needed to be hospitalized…so before the holidays started she went into the hospital and only now she got discharged … and of course I couldn’t just leave her and go have fun with my own family…so

now when my husband asked me to join him for a week only in his work trip that lasts a month to an European country… I jumped with joy to the idea ..although he told me that i would be alone half of the day beacuse he would be busy..anyways i am fine with that....but the problem is ..how could we leave our schooling kids alone at home with the housemaid?…and who will look after their studies? …my two elders are fine..they can get along well on their own.. but occasionally they get back to me to explain lessons that were hard to understand…but my little boy is a lazy bone ..he doesn’t study by him self nor he does his homework if there was no one to watch over him… after giving it some thoughts..i asked my sis to stay with them and look after my boy’s studies ….and lucky me she had already decided that she would skip a semester of collage….so she would be home when they are back of school…although my hubby keeps insuring me that everything would be fine .. so I needn’t worry but I can’t help it…because this would be the first time that both of us leave the kids alone at home…although there was another time but they were very young at the time so I let the elders stay with my parents..and took only my little boy who was two years old ... anyways after spending the eid and most of the holiday going from one hospital to another and having to go through the emotional stress of that ....and the pain i was feeling for another matter that concerns someone very dear to me and was bothering me and giving me sleepless nights for so many weeks and kind of got sorted out and settled now ( i pray)..…although i am still not very happy because of it ...but i am accepting it and hope time prove us all wrong and prove (...) right for (...) choice and for (...) sake .....anyways for all these reasons I really deserve this break…..i just hope I don’t change my mind and back off in the last minute!…and if i do then i hope my husband doesnt get angry because of what he spent on the visa and ticket !..hmmm anyways he can always recover the ticket money !..(are you reading;) )